By Melanie Gerber, Counselor Columnist
Is it okay to be sad? Have you ever experienced the emotion of sadness? It seems unlikely that you haven’t; however, sadness tends to get a bad rap. Sometimes, we struggle with the idea of sadness and how, at times, uncomfortable this emotion can be.
The emotion of sadness may look different for different people, and everyone manages emotions in a personal way. Sadness is appropriate in situations of loss, disappointment, change, etc… and may linger for some time. Some days may be better than others, but feeling sad isn’t necessarily a “bad” thing.
We can learn from our life experiences and accept what has happened or not happened. Sadness may help us to explore our values in life, and it may promote personal growth and development. It may help us to gain insight into our own behaviors and why we respond the way we do or why we make the choices that we have made. Sadness can be a motivator for change and often times tearfulness, which can be a healthy part of the grief and loss process.
In these times, it is healthy to allow yourself to experience this emotion – or any emotion – and allow the grieving process to develop.
At times, it may be helpful to seek out support from friends and family throughout this process. It may even be helpful to seek out support from a professional in an effort to process emotions that are “too close” to explore with objectivity or if you are not comfortable sharing personal information with people in your support system.
How, then, can we distinguish between “normal” sadness and clinical depression?
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders; Fifth Edition (DSM-V); 2013 and the National Institute of Mental Health (NIH), the following are characteristics of clinical depression and may require professional help:
• Feeling depressed most of the day, nearly every day
• Feeling hopeless or worthless
• Having low energy
• Losing interest in activities you once enjoyed
• Having problems with sleep
• Experiencing changes in your appetite or weight
• Feeling sluggish or agitated
• Having difficulty concentrating
• Having frequent thoughts of death or suicide
If you are experiencing these symptoms, it may be helpful or necessary to seek out professional help from a therapist, primary care physician and/or psychiatrist. The good news is that depression is treatable and responds well to therapy.
Remember, in either situation, whether you are experiencing situationally appropriate sadness or clinical depression, you are not alone. Support can take many forms and may include professional therapy. Reaching out for support is a brave and courageous act.
