BY: JOSEPH DEBELL, OPINION EDITOR
Photo Courtesy of Wikimeida Commons
Even though music can be a powerful tool in politics, the “Nikki Haley Anthem” is more laughable than uplifting.
With 2024 being a presidential election year, it looks like Americans are getting the same matchup as the 2020 Election: Joe Biden versus Donald Trump. However, there is a dark horse in the race. Her name is Nikki Haley, and she is the former Governor of “the palmetto state,” South Carolina.
Despite most Americans not wanting a rematch of the 2020 presidential election, Haley hasn’t been a popular option for voters as of recently. Take her losing to the “’none of these candidates’ option” in the Nevada Republican primary as an example of her unpopularity.
New York Times Columnists weighed in about their feelings about Nikki Haley’s campaign. Rosie Gray had the best take.
“Her candidacy feels trapped in the post-Tea Party, mid-Obama administration era.”
While her campaign is trapped, the song is trapped in the Captain Planet and the Planeteers outro song era of music.
The song, titled “Nikki Haley Anthem,” is performed by Larry Dvoskin and is funded by the venture capitalist Tim Draper.
Larry Dvoskin, an accomplished songwriter, starts the track by trying to do the impossible: Make Nikki Haley trendy.
The track starts with a hand-clap beat reminiscent of Toni Basil’s 1981 pop hit “Hey Mickey.” This ends up being the only listenable part of the song.
Not too long later, a chorus chants in such a grating way that it reminds you of those really over-the-top and unfunny cartoon theme songs.
“Never underestimate, never underestimate me, Nikki; I need Nikki, I need Nikki right now.”
The mixing of the chants is so bad that it sounds like something your uncle, who is deeply obsessed with The Beach Boys, would make in his garage.
The chorus sounds rigid and stiff, and as Walter Einenkel from The Daily Kos put it, “Painful.”
Dvoskin also dives into a rap verse that kicks off with this confusing and laughable lyric:
“Now there’s a lot of noise in politics/ ‘Cause people hitting each other with their great big sticks.”
What exactly are the “great big sticks?” Don’t ask me; maybe Haley can tell you. The verse continues:
“Now with Trump, the bully, who’s afraid to fight/ Against 5-inch heels with twice his might.”
So, if Trump is a bully, wouldn’t that make him combative? The lyrics here also make no sense.
Music reviewer Anthony Fantano put it perfectly in his video titled “Worst Song of the Year Already” when discussing how bad the rap verses are in this song.
“A shi*tty political song with a random rap verse thrown into it is like a p*ss popsicle that has a sh*t center.”
The silver lining for Haley is that, while she may not have the same fervent following as her rival, Donald Trump, having a cringy and laughable song in her honor is at least a step in trying to compete on the same level as him.
debelljb22@bonaventure.edu
